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The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham news and links for Thursday, March 3

Another day, another Deki hoddle

Middlesbrough v Tottenham Hotspur: The Emirates FA Cup Fifth Round Photo by Tottenham Hotspur FC/Tottenham Hotspur FC via Getty Images

Good morning hoddlers and happy thursday. do keep up the strength as we stumble our way towards the business end of the week.

We’ve all been learning a lot about Dejan Kulusevski lately. Take, for example, his love of basketball or his pair of Pomeranians. He’s been getting to know Tottenham as well, and appears to be well placed in the first squad for now.

It hasn’t taken long at all for Tottenham fans to give Deki his very own song, either. And it’s to the tune of a song by - you guessed it - Abba. Your hoddler-in-chief was upbraided for having the gall to cleverly include Dancing Queen during last week’s hoddle, but apparently a Deki song to the tune of Gimme Gimme Gimme by the same group is exhorted into the skies of Yorkshire.

This is Oddsbible’s version of the lyrics:

“There’s not a soul out there,

“No one to hear my prayers,

“Gimme, gimme, gimme a ginger from Sweden,

“He came from Juventus,

“And he plays on the wing.

“Gimme, gimme, gimme a ginger from Sweden,

“Number 21,

“His name is Kulusevski.”

OK, that’s pretty solid. Though I would nix the final two verses of the bridge. Cut straight to the chorus and it has real potential to become a banger.

With Dele, Christian Eriksen and Moussa Sissoko all out of the club now, Spurs are lacking in quality player songs. Harry Kane’s a classic (but unimaginative). Harry Winks’ (just a deviation of “Kane”) is literally never sung. Eric Dier and Son-Heung Min could be all we have at this point - unless you count elongating the “u” in “Hugo” as a song (it’s more of a chant than a song, really).

So thank goodness for Deki, if only for helping Spurs fans re-up their supply of player songs. Quantities had reached a critical low in the post-January travails of this club.

And while trips to Riverside may be gloomy and results at Riverside may thrust Spurs fans and Antonio Conte alike into despondency, let us sing the joys of Gimme Gimme Deki at the top of our lungs. Let us exhort his name at Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. Sing his name and he will deliver us into the light.

Glory Glory Dejan Kulusevski!

Fitzie’s track of the day: Universal Soldier, by Donovan

And now for your links:

Dan KP: Why Antonio Conte isn’t blameless as Spurs veer off course again

Roman Abramovich confirms Chelsea FC is for sale amid calls that he face sanctions from UK

EA cutting Russian teams from Fifa and NHL video games

Former Norwich City manager Daniel Farke leaves Russian club Krasnodar

Everton FC suspend ties with Russian businesses linked to Alisher Usmanov

Artem Dzyuba responds to criticism from Ukrainian footballers

Stanford University soccer player Katie Meyer dead at age 22

The Times ($$): Carlo Ancelotti among candidates for Manchester United vacancy