The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur open thread for Wednesday, June 22

Good morning hoddlers and happy wednesday.

Yes - you heard it here first. fitzie is baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack! after a few days off your hoddler-in-chief is residing in his new location. and of course of course of course there is going to be a hoddle about it, but we must first get on with more important matters - sonny’s top 23 goals countdown MUST GO ON!

(apologies to those who cannot view the embeds)

20. Southampton, Match Week 23 (L, 2-3)

This was a stumper, not gonna lie. Tottenham lost only two games in which Sonny scored. This was one of them. But when Son did score in the 70th minute, it was a big deal. The match was a slog.

Now, I think Harry Kane and Lucas did the harder work here (Lucas mostly with that wonderful cross) and Son - as he often did this season - found space inside the penalty box.

Huge goal in that moment of the game, no doubt about that. What’s lost, though, is that Spurs lost the match with goals conceded in the 80th and 82nd minutes. I don’t remember Son’s goal. I only remember losing game, which is why his goal curved so poorly here.

19. Newcastle, Match Week 31 (W, 5-1)

Wow, how good is Dejan Kulusevski eh? This was a dominant performance from Spurs, and Son’s goal provided Tottenham with a nice two-goal cushion.

Sonny had a nice assist to Matt Doherty earlier, but it was Harry Kane who started this sequence. Delivering the ball to Deki on the wing, and Sonny put on the jets to connect on Kulusevski’s cross moments later. He had great control on the first touch, making it a simple task to put Spurs well ahead of the Tykes.

18. Watford, Match Week 3 (W, 1-0)

Yes, it was earlier in the season. Yes, it was a drab 1-0 win. And yes, it was Watford. And yes again, the Watford keeper should’ve done better.

But! Make no mistake - this was a goal off a free kick from Son. We’ve seen this offseason what Sonny can do (and let’s hope Antonio Conte does as well) in free kicks. Sure, it was a boring 1-0 win at the time under Nuno, but Spurs wouldn’t be in the Champs League without it.

17. Crystal Palace, Match Week 19 (W, 3-0)

Remember the Spider Man days? Oh, how your hoddler-in-chief misses those days. Tottenham cruised to a 3-0 win against Palace earlier this season, and Son’s goal in the 74th minute plunged the proverbial dagger into the Eagles’ proverbial heart.

It was another cross from Lucas that set up this goal, but Son showed some deft footwork to work its way past former Stoke keeper Jack Butland in the near post.

Son timed his run perfectly, sticking his left leg out to connect with the ball on the first touch.

Cue Spider Man celebration.

16. First goal versus Aston Villa, Match Week 32 (W, 4-0)

There are three goals to choose from in this game - and one has to be better than the other two. (Likewise, one has to be “worse” than the other two).

So let’s go ahead with the first goal here. It was kind of a silly goal, I think. Eric Dier chucked it long, Harry Kane’s strike ricocheted off a Villa defender, landing at Sonny’s feet, who struck the ball in to the net on his first touch.

A fun goal for sure, but there are more to come.

Fitzie’s track of the day: Robert De Niro’s Waiting, by Bananarama

And now for your links:

Transfer news ($$): Arsenal reportedly bid for Raphina, though player prefers move to Barca

Gary Lineker says he suffered ‘racist abuse’ because of his ‘darkish skin’

Simone Inzaghi signs new contract with Inter Milan

Mario Gotze agrees to deal with Frankfurt

Fifa to review gender eligibility regulations