The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Wednesday, January 4

good morning! It’s another orchid hoddle!

Rejoice hoddlers. I say, rejoice! For we have blooms in December!

Your cultivated hoddler-in-chief has been tending to his orchid, Planty, since moving to DC (guys, seriously, Arlington may as well be DC and I’m kinda tired of you all bringing this up) six months ago.

Since then the orchid had undergone various transformations. Mainly in petals falling off and one stalk dying right before my eyes.

And then, with the soil out of my sight and with each passing night, life began to take hold of Planty. First the surviving stalk grew at a hypersonic rate and then it sprouted buds. Yes! Buds!

Oh you delectable teases. You pockets beaming with life!

And two of those beauties bloomed while I was away for the holidays. That’s right folks - we’ve got blossoms!

They’re so pretty too. Two perfect purple orchid blooms.

There are still another five or six buds on that stalk. I must be patient. They will come. Let everywhere be filled with blossoms!

Fitzie’s track of the day: Sleeping With A Friend, by Neon Trees

And now for your links:

Dan KP: Antonio Conte and Daniel Levy must present united front

The Athletic ($$): Conte says he is ‘committed’ to Tottenham

Frank Lampard on the brink after Everton’s humiliating defeat to Brighton

Pele buried in Santos after eight-mile funeral procession