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It is what it says it is

Non-violent things we wish for Matty Cash

It’s not nice to wish injury upon opposition players. But we can wish other things!

Tottenham introduce new “Legendary Numbers” to run alongside legacy numbers

The stuff of legends



Emerson Royal’s comp of his baby’s birth is the wholesome Spurs content you need

Welcome to the Royal Baby!

Cartilage Free Captain predicts the 2023-24 Premier League

We asked, you answered. And with not too many surprises.

Join Cartilage Free Captain’s 2023-24 Fantasy Premier League

Can Dustin remember he has a team after Week 8 this season? Let’s find out!

Five weird things we noticed in Harry Kane’s “Hot Ones” video

Harry Kane + hot wings

Introducing your All-Presidential XI

In honor of Tottenham’s James Maddison, America’s Fourth President

Tottenham Hotspur’s answers to the THST, as written by ChatGPT

Can a computer write better answers to hard questions than the Spurs board?

Presenting Tottenham Hotspur players as AI-generated Pokemon

Happy international break!

Cartilage Free Captain Predicts the 2022-23 Premier League

We put our prognostication hats on!

Join Cartilage Free Captain’s 2022-23 Fantasy Premier League

Can Dustin remember he has a team after Week 8 this season? Let’s find out!

A message from THE Cartilage Free Captain

Y’all are just the best. Thank you.

Harry Kane is at the Masters because of course he is

This is completely and utterly anticipated behavior.

Introducing the Premier League All-Hyphen Team

We’re bored on a Thursday.

Tottenham is sick and there’s no football. Let’s have a quiz!

I’m bored and need hashtag content

Harry Kane’s future, as written by an AI

Who knows where Harry Kane’s future lies? Sudowrite does!

Spurs painted into a corner by new sponsor’s deleted tweets

The Twitter admin of Dulux Paints had some fun at Tottenham’s expense today. It didn’t go over well.

Cartilage Free Poetry Slam 15: Erik Lamela Bredlik

Bah gawd, has it been seven years?!

Join the 2020-21 Cartilage Free Captain fantasy Premier League team!

Can you beat me? (Answer: yes, obviously)

Son Heung-Min has a military buzz-cut and I’m crying now

That hair! That beautiful hair!

We trained a neural network on photos of Tottenham Hotspur players. Good luck sleeping tonight.

Computers are getting very good at generating human faces, if it has enough source material. We didn’t give it enough source material.

What’s your “Lifetime Best World XI” lineup?

Your standard best-of lineup... but with a twist!

One Shining Moment: your Carty Free Article Champion

We have a winner!

The Tottenham Hotspur Quarantine House

Choose wisely! Death is not an option.

Which SB Nation soccer blogs would YOU be quarantined with?

I’m bored.

Carty Free Article Bracket — THE FINAL


Carty Free Article Bracket: Say hello to the Elite Eight

Sadly, no nets to cut down for the winners

Carty Free Article Bracket: the Sweet Sixteen resolves today

We are down to 8 articles after today.

Carty Free Article Bracket: the march to the Elite Eight

Upsets in the bracket!

Carty Free Article Bracket — Redknapp Regional Round 2

We will be down to 16 after today.

Carty Free Article Bracket: Chirpy Regional

Back to the well we go.